시간
8년전, 9년전 쯤에 토요일. 회사에서 돌아오는 길. 차를 몰고 오면서 길을 잘 못 들어 한 번도 가지 않은 거리를 지나가고 있었고, 차안에는 Ronald Brautigam의 Mozart 소나타가 흐르고 있었다. 신선한 공기, 비에 젖은 거리. 상쾌한 기분. 생각난다.
Life goes on and I am here.
Things changed and happened to me for the last two months. But I am still here caught in this planet of crazy monkeys. Why am I still here when my wife died seven years ago and I am always feeling that I am in the wrong place and time? Because I have no direction in my life. Because I have no mission to accomplish in this life. Whatever I do, I do it because of the law of inertia. I keep doing stupid and meaningless things in my life. I thought if I cut myself off from the outside world, I could find a meaning or a purpose in my life. I was wrong. As long as there is me, this thinking brain, in this world, the world will not be a different place. Unless I kill myself as an animal, a sick animal always thinking of, seeking a way out from this world, the world will be always the same. Maybe, the world has no problem. Just like nature has no problem. Animals and plants are out there enjoying their existence, just accepting what the world is. They make no plans. They don't worry abo...
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