The question is 'can I stand being alone until I die?'

Yes. That is the most important question because it is very likely that I will stay alone till I die.

I find it highly unlikely that I will find a woman that I can love the way I loved my dead wife. It was such a rare case that I found a woman like her. 

I grow old everyday and I give up more and more everyday the chance of meeting the right woman for me. 

So, the question is this. Can I become a self-sufficient man who can enjoy himself without a woman? If I can make myself that kind of widower, I will be OK. If not, my life will not improve and I will not feel better. 

How the hell you make friends with yourself by the way?